Microdosing Mindfulness, part 3

Mindful underemployment means enjoy the moment.

I have been mindfully underemployed for four and a half months. If my younger 20-something self had known that at one time in my midlife I would be without a steady job for such a long stretch, I would have pre-panicked. I would have anticipated the overwhelming amount of stress and sense of failure that surely would accompany being jobless. I would have wondered what on earth could have gone wrong with my life for me to be seemingly so unstable.

But you see, my younger self was also paying attention to certain people in the world. These people seemed to smile from a source deep within, and to float over life’s tumultuous waters with a profound sense of contentment. They could be sad, but never for very long. They could be angered by injustice, but still seem at peace. They could be living from paycheck to paycheck and eating from emergency food boxes with no vacation on the horizon ever and still seem utterly delighted to be alive. These various people spanned age groups and backgrounds. There didn’t seem to be any particular “secret sauce” that these soul-shining humans had in common, no one thing that might explain their general ease at navigating life. They had an intangible essence that I craved, an inner radiance that rippled outward: Peace.

For decades now I have been practicing peace by practicing presence. Microdosing mindfulness shows up in the space I create for myself each morning to meditate and journal, reflecting on gratitude and noticing the very moment I am in. It shows up in the relationships I maintain, those I initiate, strengthen, and even in those I release. It shows up in the letting go of expectation and sense of entitlement, and also in the knowing that I am valued and valuable, and that my value has nothing to do with my attachments or possessions. Microdosing mindfulness shows up by being in my body and getting curious with movement and breath, and discovering that the universe is unfathomably vast and I am not separate from it but an absolutely stunning part of it and so are you. It shows up by being in love with all of the other parts and pieces that make this life experience happen at all. There is not an hour in the day that goes by where I do not think or say outloud: I AM GRATEFUL. When gratitude is in abundance, lack doesn’t stand a chance. When peace is practiced, peace shows up.

The practice showed up for me big time during this underemployment stretch. I had bad days. But I can say honestly that I didn’t feel despair. I was intentional in my job search, trusting in myself, and I floated over the tumultuous waters of rejection with a profound sense of contentment. I could be sad, but not for very long. I could be living off dwindling savings and minimal earnings and still be utterly delighted to be alive.

If my younger 20-something self could have glanced beyond the apparent face value of temporary joblessness, and witnessed the actual moments during those four months, she would have found me glowing with an inner radiance that rippled outward. She would have found me at peace. Because the practice of presence really works.

PRACTICE IDEA - It’s really easy to notice lack, or what we don’t have. But it’s not because we’re inherently ungrateful. It’s because we’ve been conditioned by a culture of comparison and consumerism, and a notion that success is going to happen some time in the future, or that the past was better than the present. Reconditioning starts with intention, and bringing the awareness into the right here and now. Take two minutes each day to notice what’s here, near, and far. First thing in the morning is a lovely time for this practice, letting your breath, brain, and body acclimate to the context of the day and the environment. Start with what’s here, then near, then far, then near, then here again. Resist the inclination to attach story to what you notice (like if you notice your stomach growling, try not to jump immediately to “I must be hungry!” or if you notice a gray cloud in the distance just let it be a gray cloud instead of “looks like rain” …).

HERE - Close your eyes and notice one thing that is right here with you in this moment. This could be your breath, or the bones in your feet, or the sensation of the sun on your face.
NEAR - Open your eyes and notice one thing that is near you right now in this moment. Maybe it’s a potted plant on a shelf, or dust particles in the sunlight.
FAR - Shift your gaze out farther and notice one thing on the horizon. Maybe it’s a mountain or a passing cloud, a bird on a wire or the shingles on a roof.
NEAR - Bring your attention close again and notice one thing that is near you right now in this moment. Maybe it’s a lingering aroma from breakfast, or the sound of the heater.
HERE - Close your eyes and notice one thing that is right here with you in this moment. This could be palms of your hands touching, or the heart beating between your lungs.

Close the practice by thinking or saying out loud to all that you noticed, “Thank you for being here.”

Noticing what’s near and far at the Ma-le’l Dunes over the summer.